Grief

Yesterday was one of the worst days in 18 years that you and I have experienced as parents. I don't want to write about it, I don't want to think about it, I don't want to deal with it. As I spent some time journaling and praying today, I thought about you. As much as I don't want to write about this, because I want to pretend or wish that it didn't happen, it will forever be a part of our parenting story.

The moment I do want to remember is us being a united front. The experience revealed to me how much you have grown, how much we have grown, how wise you are, and how incredible you are as a mother.

As we sat on the couch yesterday and you shared you heart, I saw you with fresh eyes. I saw your motherly heart open up vulnerably. You had grace for me. You heald a standard for our kids. You didnt just look at the consequences of the matter, you looked at the heart, the emotion, the hurt and the pain.

I see you.

I love you.

I couldn't do this life without you.

I am saddened by what has happened. But I feel hopeful that together we can navigate this as we move forward.